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The New Millennium Is Guinness Time
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| In anticipation of
the new millennium, beer-maker Guinness has
struck a deal with the Old Royal Observatory
in England to sponsor its year 2000 celebration.
According to this agreement, Greenwich Mean
Time would be renamed Guinness Mean Time.
In addition, seconds, which were traditionally
counted in "pips" would now be counted
in "pint drips." Finally, because
of the official sponsorship, a Guinness tavern
would open inside the Observatory and the
countdown would feature a Guinness clock counting
"pint settling time."
This statement was
issued by Guinness in an embargoed release,
meaning it was not to be printed until the
official announcement date, April 1. The
Financial Times, however, broke the embargo
and published an article a day early about
how some companies were exploiting the millennium
excitement to promote their brand names.
Upon realizing the truth to this hoax, the
Financial Times published a curt retraction
the next week.
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| The april fools practical jokes and
gag gifts contained in this site are so funny that
if I am drinking milk while checking these jokes
out, I snort all that white liquid out my nose!
Don't be one of the april fools, doggonit, check
these practical jokes and gag gifts out! The practical
jokes practically bring the house down! Down through
history the fools of April have had their day, one
day a year. See what those april fools have been
up to and don't laugh with them, laugh at them.
- Walter Cronkite
April and her band of fools just love the tomfoolery
on this site. From media hoaxes to pranks to gag
gifts to practical jokes this site makes me laugh
even when I'm in trouble with the law. Say, does
anyone know if April is available because I would
like to be her fool if you know what I mean. And
if not does she have a sister?
- Bill Clinton
This April fools practical jokes and gag gifts
pad is a jolly good site, indeed. I perused it
over one time and laughed so hard it almost made
me pee. Then a month later, I thought I would
look up a few April fools practical jokes to play
on dear young William (and even bought a few gag
gifts) and I came back to this pad and laughed
so hard I did pee my pants. Jolly good thing I
am wearing Depends now days.
- Queen Elizabeth
It is not knowledge that is important, but rather
imagination. And this April fools site is chocked
full of imagination. And of course knowledge.
Of course you can't deny the great gag gifts and
practical jokes you find here, either. When I
wrote my great theory I wasn't really thinking
of great media hoaxes or fart jokes but yes, now
I see that they too can apply. The jokes here
are practical and the gifts make me gag. Would
you like to see me slurp a loogie?
Eddie Einstein (Albert's little brother)
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